Series: Letters to My Younger Self

It will get better


Hey girl…Listen, you feel alone right now I know that but it won’t always feel like this. The kids at school are mean, the boys don’t like you that much, and the ones that do only see your body. I’m so proud of you for holding your ground with them. I promise you that it will have been worth it.

Mom and Dad will stop fighting eventually, but for now, just enjoy having them both around. I want you to fight a little bit more for your dreams. Don’t worry about college because you’ll figure that out. Workout right now and eat healthy, apply to modeling agencies everywhere. They love 16-year-olds.

You’ll feel a really deep sense of FOMO by missing things for your dreams but I swear you won’t have missed anything incredible. You’ll make a lot of friends and you’ll realize that with some courage, you can do anything. Be confident in yourself. I know the opinions of others seem loud right now and you’ll feel like you need their validation but you don’t. Not everyone around you was raised by a French mother with so much love, so be kind to others.

There’s going to be a boy that will come into your life when you’re around 19. He’ll seem like he’s everything but I promise you he’s not. Enjoy him, but don’t get too attached.

Dad is wounded; that’s why he yells. He doesn’t mean to scare you and when he finds out that’s how you feel, it will break his heart. Believe me when I tell you that he loves you. You won’t see it right now but you will eventually. Listen to Mamie and Papi more. Ask them questions about everything and ask them about stories from when they were younger. You’ll need those words when they’re no longer here.

Don’t worry too much about your friends, just be kind and people will like you for that. You’ll have many friends from around the world someday so just hold on to the real ones you have in your life right now. Hold onto God and look to him for everything. Don’t think you can do life without him, that part gets a different kind of hard.

You’ll develop a thing called anxiety and you’ll try to run from that feeling but it’ll stick with you wherever you go. You’ll catch your breath so don’t worry too much.

Most of all, my love, don’t be afraid to leave. This city and the people in it will always be here. You can go far and you can always come back, and you will.