So you’ve managed to dive head first into the pits of what feels like your own personal hell. I get it. You just broke up with the person you thought was the love of your life and you feel like everything is falling apart. Maybe you’ve already tried yoga or talking to the cliche therapist. Regardless of what you’ve done, it’s just not working. As someone who has a residency at the lovely Rock Bottom Hotel, I can help you get over your demons.
Step 1: Cut. Your. Bangs.
Yes, cutting your bangs is one of the most therapeutic disasters you can do in your time of despair. Although your friends may rule against this decision, don’t listen to them. A change in your cut may be one of the only ways to cut the stress out of your life. Bangs are one of the most simple ways to change your hair without damaging it. Always remember that bangs will grow out.
Step 2: Pierce your face.
I find that when I get a new piercing, my mind starts to focus on how badass and edgy I look. By introducing a new hole to my body, I have a new project of and a way to keep my mind off of everything. Don’t worry, the needle pain is definitely worth all of the weird stares.
Step 3: Dye your hair.
Whenever I fall out the sad tree and hit every branch on the way down, I tend to dye my hair. There’s nothing more satisfying than opening up a new tube of color and taking a whiff. Fun colors are always a must in this situation. Though you may not fit to society’s standards with your new vibrant hair, they don’t deserve to be in the presence of an actual god or goddess, anyway.
Step 4: Sit in the shower and cry.
We’ve all been there — sitting under running water while being fully clothed. It’s always fun not knowing if the liquid running down your face is water or tears. Besides that, sometimes all you need is a good cry. The hot, steamy water is also perfect for opening up for pores, which will help push that sad demon out.
Step 5: Get a tattoo.
Imagine your body like a fresh piece of canvas. Every tattoo you put on your body is automatically turned into art. You deserve to be an art piece in the best art gallery around. Make sure to catch the best flash tattoo ideas since this is obviously going to be a spontaneous decision.
Step 5: Work your butt off — er, on.
Working out while being depressed can help release certain chemicals in your brain that can actually make you feel better. By spending time at the gym, your butt will get bigger and your depression will get smaller. Always remember that the harder you throw your dumbbells onto the floor, the faster you get rid of the gaping hole that you feel in your heart.
Step 6: WEEEEED.
Whenever I’m feeling down and blue, I smoke up and let the sweet taste of green take me away. No, it’s not a permanent solution to your problems, but it can definitely help clear your mind. The moment my mind starts to float, the creative gremlin inside of me takes over and allows me to write without boundaries, which is always a lot better than making any rash decisions.
Always remember that everything is going to be okay. No matter what you’re going through, this is just a small bump in the road. Even if it feels like you’ll never see the silver lining in the darkest of days, just know that you are not alone. In the words of an amazing musical “Dear Evan Hansen”that talks about suicide and lies that eventually catch up to people, You Will Be Found.